Friday, November 30, 2007

A little of this and that...

I have been busy, working in the visual journal, working on swaps, and photoart journals, and I don't always feel like I have time to download everything and write about it.
I like grids. There is something about the symmetry, and the repetition.
Just fun, using up bits of leftover projects, and printing disasters that ended up looking cool.
The first page that I have included any text. I liked how it looked, and I wanted to remember why I put these items down, or rather what they made me think of.

I feel that I am going through a major shift in my life. It is one of those times when the pattern of my life reveals another path. Sometimes the various things I have pursued in my life thus far seem so disjointed and totally without plan that I feel like a complete mess, and then things shift and I begin to see a pattern to all of these pursuits.

It is like a trail of bread crumbs through the woods, they begin to glow and I can see that there has been a direction to my life. Despite all of the times I have been afraid and insecure, and have stayed in jobs and other situations too long, thinking that I had to have money, or healthcare, or a relationship and if I took a step off the path in front of me I would be lost, the bread crumbs have showed up to lead me to the next thing.

Far too frequently I have gone trembling with fear and dreading the rug being pulled out from under me, but I have gone, and I have always been rewarded. It has taken me far too long to realize and trust that I am being led in the direction of my heart, and that it has been my heart lovingly leaving the bread crumbs for me to follow.

I am seeing the path diverge again, and I don't know where I am going yet, but I feel more trust than I have felt in a long time. I do have some ideas about where I might be going, but it is too soon to put it into words. Still in the planning and thinking and meditating stages. I think that the slump I was in all summer was a fallow time preparing me for change.

Making visual journals is helping, I don't have to use words, and it is a relief right now, I always over-analyze things. Now I just grab the color that appeals to me, and shapes and items that may reveal a pattern...of bread crumbs.

1 comment:

Judy Wise said...

Oh, Gwen, your pages warm my heart. Thank you for sharing them; they are soulful, beautiful ... just like you.xoxo